July 19, 2021
“I wrote this when I first got sober.” – Cheyanne
I’ve been here before I think,
I’ve been here before I swear…
I thought I overcame it then,
Now I don’t seem to care.
All the pain that rushes through me
I feel it rushing in…
There’s something that felt better,
The rush under my skin.
For a moment I feel okay,
For that rushing second I feel fine.
All those wasted rushing moments,
Now I’m fighting back my time.
How did I get here again?
I know what I need to do
But how do I trail back there?
I don’t want to face the truth.
I feel her pulling at my heart.
I feel her trying to pull me back.
I see the beauty and the love she had
Before I fell off track.
I see the same little girl I was…
Always waiting to feel loved.
Knowing she deserves more
But never gets enough.
Fighting for my life back…
I know what I have to do.
I know I was supposed to be someone,
Now it’s time to find out who.
She held me through my weakness,
Somehow gave me the strength.
To be able to beat this thing
It’s her I have to thank.
I just had to pick myself up again…
And so I guess I did.
I dont want to look at my child and see my own self through my kid.
This is crucial for who I am..
Its needed for who I am to become.
I’m stronger than I was.
I’m stronger now when I’m her Mom.